In a world that’s so focused on woman’s equality, women’s health, women’s image and women’s standards its easy to get caught up in the moment and forget men are also pigeonholed by some of the same standards, unrelenting in the opposite direction. Men are the victims of double standards too and there are some behaviors women get away with easily, whereas if a man acted in the exact same way they would probably be socially lynched, especially with the way information spreads online.
On Oct. 2 I attended the Diamonds in the Sky STARS charity fundraiser; a women’s only dinner, dance and general good time, complete with an abundance of alcohol.
Now, its not as if women were actually the only ones there. There was a male MC, auctioneer and Kinsmen members were the butlers for the evening. The butlers were auctioned off to high-paying tables and — all in the name of charity — were essentially the table’s slave for the evening.
Along with fetching drinks, two Kinsmen were made to leg wrestle on the floor and when one took to the floor for a sexy but still very appropriate dance solo he was followed by an older women determined to match his moves.
Had the roles been reversed and a young girl was followed to the dance floor by an older gentleman dancing in such a manner I don’t think the situation would have gone over with as much good humor, even if it was for charity.
If the roles were reversed I’m not sure any portion of the evening would have gotten by unscorned by the public, especially the female side of it. Men bidding on women and paying for them to serve them drinks and be at their beck and call for an evening of drunken frivolity doesn’t seem like it would get good reviews.
Another Kinsmen good-naturedly bared his torso upon request so one of the attendees could check out and touch his abs after she’d lusted after them. And while there may have been a few muttering at that not many are going to find the request overly offensive or something to make a big fuss about.
If a male at a males only event has asked a female butler to bare her stomach he would be in big trouble.
Some would argue in this situation the women didn’t choose to open her shirt on her own will and that she was accosted, so was he.
That being said there’s a time and a place for everything and asking a complete stranger to show any part of themselves, in any setting, is not appropriate.
Now I’m sure if that young butler had really been truly uncomfortable he could have said no to the request and the fun would have continued without incident. But in today’s society women are not generally considered as threatening when it comes to sexual dominance as men and male body rights take a backseat.
While equality should never hamper a person’s individual rights or ability to choose it needs to be remembered equality is just that, equal treatment and opportunity and that is a two-way street.
There are also many males only charity events held but I’m guessing such shenanigans would be less socially accepted coming from males.
I’m not looking to put down or devalue any of the efforts of the event; they’re both wonderful opportunities for people to get involved and support their community, as well as simply being a ton of fun. I’ve attended the past two years and have had a great time dancing with friends and supporting a worthy cause.
But in a world were equality is in suffrage that bottom line: equality, needs to be kept in mind and held in just esteem. Like anything in this world equality also comes with its rewards, challenges and consequences.
Amelia Naismith is the new reporter for the Leduc/Wetaskiwin Pipestone Flyer and writes a regular column for the paper.